Two

TWO

“Save the prairie-hen, sometimes startled from its lurking-place in the rank grass; and, in the migratory season, pigeons, high overhead on the wing, in dense multitudes eclipsing the day like a passing storm cloud; save these–there being no wide woods with their underwood–birds were strangely few.

“Blank stillness would for hours reign unbroken on this prairie. ‘It is the bed of a dried-up sea,’ said the companionless sailor–no geologist–to himself, musing at twilight upon the fixed undulations of that immense alluvial expanse bounded only by the horizon, and missing there the stir that, to alert eyes and ears, animates at all times the apparent solitudes of the deep.

“But a scene quite as variance with one’s antecedents may yet prove suggestive of them. Hooped round by the level rim, the prairie was to John Marr a reminder of ocean.

“With some of his former shipmates, chums on certain cruises, he had contrived, prior to this last and more remote removal, to keep up a little correspondence at odd intervals. But from tidings of anybody of any sort he, in common with the other settlers, was now cut off; quite cut off, except from such news as might be conveyed over the grassy billows by the last-arrived prairie-schooner–the vernacular term, in those parts and times, for the emigrant-wagon arched high over with sail-cloth, and voyaging across the cast champaign. There was no reachable post-office as yet; not even the rude little receptive box with lid and leather hinges, set up at convenient intervals on a stout stake along some solitary green way, affording a perch for birds, and which, later in the unremitting advance of the frontier, would perhaps decay into a mossy monument, attesting yet another successive overleaped limit of civilized life; a life which in America can to-day hardly be said to have any western bound but the ocean that washes Asia. Throughout these plains, now in places overpopulous with towns overopulent; sweeping plains, elsewhere fenced off in every direction into flourishing farms–pale townsmen and hale farmers alike, in part, the descendents of the first sallow settlers; a region that half a century ago produced little for the sustenance of man; but to-day launching its superabundant wheat-harvest on the world;–of this prairie, now everywhere intersected with wire and rail, hardly can it be said that at the period here written of there was so much as a traceable road. To the long-distance traveller the oak-groves, wide apart, and varying in compass and rom; these, with recent settlements, yet more widely separate, offered some landmarks; but otherwise he steered by the sun. In early mid-summer, even going but from one log-encampment to the next, a journey it might be of hours or good part of a day, travel was much like navigation. In some more enriched depressions between the long, green, graduated swells, smooth as thoseof ocean becalmed receiving and subduing to its own tranquility the voluminous surge raised by some far-off hurricane of days previous, here one would catch the first indications of advancing strangers either in the distance, as a far sail at sea, by the glistening white canvas of the wagon, the wagon itself wading through the rank vegetation and hidden by it, or, failing that, when near to, in the ears of the team, peeking, if not above the tall tiger lilies, yet above the yet taller grass.”

“Luxuriant, this wilderness; but, to its denizen, a friend left behind anywhere in the world seemed not alone absent to sight, but an absentee from existence.

“Though John Marr’s shipmates could not all have departed life, yet as subjects of meditation they were like phantoms of the dead. As the growing sense of his environment threw him more and more upon retrospective musings, these phantoms, next to those of his wife and child, became spiritual companions, losing something of their first indistinctness and putting on at last a dim semblance of mute life; and they were lit by that aureola circling over any object of the affections in the past for reunion with which an imaginative heart passionately yearns.”

Melville.

The dark oak rafters, forming the main roof gable of the house, are pitched low, so that there is only a narrow corridor, running east and west, of standing room, and this is flanked on either side by low-roofed shadows, filled with trunks, old furniture, magazines, and the like, things that Mother–though she survives in the nursing home downtown and knows she will never leave it–will not allow us to dispose of. Against the rock chimney is a makeshift desk–an old door, laid flat on crates–and running the length of this are the books–books that I have bought, found, begged throughout my life, ever since the morning when Carl and I were playing in a haunted house, and we broke into what appeared to be a secret closet, discovered a small decanter of medicated sherry, the remnants of whalebone corset, and an old copy of Typee. We rescued the whalebone from the rotted cloth, drank the sherry, and spent the rest of the day devouring what the bookworms had left of Typee.

Reaching the desk, I sit before it for a moment, uncritical, with per­ception undiminished, searching a balance.

Melville, White-Jacket, called to observe a flogging: “…balanced myself on my best centre.”

There are the titles, the feel of an old binding: Mardi, for example, an early edition, in two volumes, dark brown, maroon, and black, the backing ribbed, and inside, the marbled end-papers, and the Preface:

“Not long ago, having published two narratives of voyages in the Pacific, which, in many quarters, were received with incredulity, the thought occurred to me, of indeed writing a romance of Poly­nesian adventure, and publishing it as such; to see whether, the fiction might not, possibly be received for a verity: in some degree the reverse of my previous experience.”

Then, Gray’s Anatomy, Goss, Twenty-fifth Edition; and a disreput­able copy of The Hoosier Schoolmaster, by Edward Eggleston. A thin, modern Enghsh book, Cosmology, by H. Bondi; The Search For At­lantis, by Edwin Bjorkman; and a copy of Natural History, March, 1952, including an article, Shrunken Heads. A Textbook Of Embry­ology, by Jordon and Kindred; also, Journal Of Morphology, Volume XIX, 1908, containing A Study Of The Causes Underlying The Origin Of Human Monsters.

Glancing upward, at the eight-inch rafters casting regular shadows across each other and across the roof boards, down the length of the attic, I am reminded

of the forecastle of the Julia in Omoo, planted “right in the bows, or, as sailors say, in the very eyes of the ship…”

“All over, the ship was in a most dilapidated condition; but in the forecastle it looked like the hollow of an old tree going to decay. In every direction the wood was damp and discoloured, and here and there soft and porous. Moreover, it was hacked and hewed without mercy, the cook frequently helping himself to splinters for kindling-wood from the bitts and beams.”

and there was “that gloomy hole where we burrowed like rabbits,” in Redburn…as well as

The Gunner in White-Jacket“…among all the persons and things on board that puzzled me, and filled me most with strange emotions of doubt, misgivings, and mystery, was the gunner–a short, square, grim man, his hair and beard grizzled and singed, as if with gunpowder. His skin was of a flecky brown, like the stained barrel of a fowling-piece, and his hollow eyes burned in his head like blue-lights. He it was who had access to many of those mysterious vaults I have spoken of. Often he might be seen groping his way into them…”

and

“…he was, withal, a very cross, bitter, illnatured, inflammable little old man. So, too, were all the members of the gunner’s gang; including the two gunner’s mates, and all the quarter-gunners. Every one of them had the same dark brown complexion; all their faces looked like smoked hams. They were continually grumbling and growling about the batteries; running in and out among the guns; driving the sailors away from them; and cursing and swearing as if all their consciences had been powder-singed and made callous by their calling. Indeed they were a most unpleasant set of men; especially Priming, the nasal-voiced gunner’s mate, with the harelip; and Cylinder, his stuttering coadjutor, with the clubbed foot.”

The wind rises, screaming faintly, intensely, against the north side, and the old house creaks.

“The hemlock shakes in the rafter, the oak in the driving keel.”

and, in a letter, he (Melville)

“I have a sort of sea-feeling here in the country, now that the ground is covered with snow. I look out of my window in the morning when I rise as I would out of a port-hole of a ship in the Atlantic. My room seems a ship’s cabin; & at nights when I wake up & hear the wind shrieking, I almost fancy there is too much sail in the house, & I had better go on the roof and rig in the chimney.”

and again, at another, season,

“In summer, too, Canute-like: sitting here, one is often reminded of the sea. For not only do long ground-swells roll the slanting grain, and little wavelets of the grass ripple over upon the low piazza, as their beach, and the blown down of dandelions is wafted like the spray, and the purple of the mountains is just the purple of the billows, and a still August noon broods upon the deep meadows, as a calm upon the Line; but the vastness and the lonesomeness are so oceanic, and the silence and the sameness, too, that the first peep of a strange house, rising beyond the trees, is for all the world like spying, on the Barbary coast, an unknown sail.”

Glancing again at the rafters, I think of my great-grandfather, who built this house with his own hands: Hammond Mills, a yankee, born in New York City, who went up-river to Albany, and then west to Ohio and Indiana–a serious, hard-working man, whose favorite saying, his philosophy, perhaps, was handed down carefully from generation to generation, with the old furniture:

“The Mind is to the Body as the Whole Man is to the Earth.”

(and there is Melville, Mardi: “We have had vast developments of parts of men; but none of manly wholes.”

Hammond Mills built this house, acquired the land, and farmed it. His first-born son, by the law of primogeniture, inherited and continued farming, passing on in turn to his first-born son: my father; and

Father married a Stonecipher, poor white, southerner. Her people came over from England as bond servants, landed somewhere on the coast, say Charleston, worked out their time and then worked gradually inland, keeping the mountains to the west until Boone had shown the way; then moving through the Gap, to the Ohio, down as far as Injeanny, where they settled in Brown and Crawford counties, started little hill farms, and hung on when many of the others continued west to Pike County, Missouri, and thence to California, as Pikers…

Greasy Creek, Gnaw Bone, and Shake Rag Hollow–the hills, ridges, knolls and bluffs to the north of the river–this is where the Stoneciphers dug in–farming, hunting, brawling, making likker–and later, in the flatboat era, moving down the Ohio and the Wabash, “half alligator and half horse, with a tech of wildcat”…but always, back to the farm, the root.

The folklore, too, came with the Stoneciphers:

Cut fence rails in the light of the moon, butcher before the full moon if the meat is to fry hard. Soap is to be made in the light of the moon, and stirred one way by one person. A waning moon is good for shingling, because it pulls the shingles flat.

and

A girl should never marry until she can pick clothes out of boiling water with her fingers, and if she sits on a table she will never marry. If a person kills a toad, his cow will give bloody milk.

And there was other folklore, too. Mother, hard-working, proud of the little cleanliness and respectability she could muster for us, quick with the flat of her hand when Carl or I misused the language, nevertheless used one word for all occasions, a word as old as words, ancient Anglo-Saxon association of four letters: shit. I have seen her dressed in her one good dress, serving tea for the preacher and his wife, and the word would come out, hang there in the middle of the room, unadorned and unexplained: and Mother would continue pouring.

After Father died, Carl left school, and, for a while, worked as a lumberjack in the Pacific Northwest; Mother was nearly frantic, he was gone for months and months, without sending word. Finally there was a postcard, undated and unsigned, but in his handwriting:

Drink gin after cutting oak; bourbon follows pine.

This was all, for more than a year. He came home one day, “to get more winter clothes,” as he said. He had joined an archeological expedition, persuading some college men of his erudition in Indian lore: in a few days–after delivering a lecture to Mother and me on the origins of American civilization–he was off to Alaska and the Aleutians,

“to dig boneyards in the Rat Islands.”

Again, there was no word for months. Then there began to arrive, not cards or letters, but weird objects, drawings, fragments of stone and bone. A piece of steatite, apparently carved by Carl himself, in the shape of a killer whale; a section of human skull, occipital, huge, larger than Carl’s own; a carving of an Indian woman, seated, with a symmetrical opening in her abdomen in which appeared a face, with a pair of huge, fierce eyes.

He was back again after several months, with more wild objects–and stories, in which, as Melville said, “fact and fancy, halfway meeting, interpenetrate, and form one seamless whole.”

There was the shrunken human head, from the headwaters of the Amazon, which he admitted to having won from a fellow-archeoIogist in a poker game;

his story of a day’s work carrying human remains from the cave where they were discovered, across the rocky, treacherous terrain, in a rainstorm, racing against the tide, to the boat–the description, with gestures, of picking up a bag of bones, the feeling of holding it in his arms, of having to hurry, with great delicacy, over the wet rocks, cradling the empty, formless treasures; and

the obscure tale of cannibalism, told when Carl was drunk, part of which seemed to take place a thousand years ago and involve Indians, and part of which took place just recently and involved Carl–something to do with eating a human being, genitals and extremities first, then the internal organs, flesh of the trunk, the neck, and finally the head–but the eyes! (and here Carl’s eyes became wild) he couldn’t eat the eyes!–or he did eat them and couldn’t forget them, they haunted him, went straight to the brain, clinging to the lobes like barnacles to a ship’s hull…and the feeling of holding only the skull in his hand, the eyes gone…

Olson:

“Herman Melville was born in New York, August 1,1819, and on the 12th of that month the Essex, a well-found whaler of 238 tons, sailed from Nantucket with George Pollard, Jr. as captain, Owen Chase and Matthew Joy mates, 6 of her complement of 20 men Negroes, bound for the Pacific Ocean, victualled and provided for two years and a half.

“A year and three months later, on November 20, 1820, just south of the equator in longitude 119 West, this ship, on a calm day, with the sun at east, was struck head on twice by a bull whale, a spermaceti about 85 feet long, and with her bows stove in, filled and sank

“Her twenty men set out in three open whaleboats for the coast of South America 2000 miles away. They had bread (200 lb. a boat), water (65 gallons), and some Galapagos turtles. Although they were at the time no great distance from Tahiti, they were ignorant of the temper of the natives and feared cannibalism.”

and

“The three boats, with the seventeen men divided among them, moved under the sun across ocean together until the 12th of January when, during the night, the one under the command of Owen Chase, First Mate, became separated from the other two.

“Already one of the seventeen had died, Matthew Joy, Second Mate. He had been buried January 10th. When Charles Shorter, Negro, out of the same boat as Joy, died on January 23rd, his body was shared among the men of that boat and the Captain’s, and eaten. Two days more and Lawson Thomas, Negro, died and was eaten. The bodies were roasted to dryness by means of fires kindled on the ballast sand at the bottom of the boats.”

Thus, Herman Melville was born…

“…which joyous event occured at 1/2 past 11 last night–our dear Maria displayed her accustomed fortitude in the hour of peril, & is as well as circumstances & the intense heat will admit–while the little Stranger has good lungs, sleeps well & feeds kindly, he is in truth a chopping Boy–”

But there is more to this, to the birth of Herman: what is it about legs that so possessed the later man? Age twenty-one, the father dead, the family without funds, Herman unpaid for a year’s teaching, and unemployed, shipped on a whaler for the Pacific, and thus broke away from home; but reaching the Marquesas, he again broke away, deserting ship on the island of Nukahiva, and thus doubly escaped, twice radically changed his world; and, at the entrance to the valley of Typee,

“I began to feel symptoms which I at once attributed to the exposure of the preceding night. Cold shiverings and a burning fever succeeded one another at intervals, while one of my legs was swelled to such a degree, and pained me so acutely, that I half suspected I had been bitten by some venomous reptile…”

And subsequently, the leg swelled and pained him whenever he thought or acted to escape from the Typees, subsiding when he was content with his life there; the leg saying to him–or he to himself–I cannot move.

Again, in Omoo, confined to the stocks in the Calabooza Beretanee (British Jail):

“How the rest managed, I know not; but, for my own part, I found it very hard to get asleep. The consciousness of having one’s foot pinned; and the impossibility of getting it anywhere else than just where it was, was most distressing.

“But this was not all: there was no way of lying but straight on your back; unless, to be sure, one’s limb went round and round in the ankle, like a swivel. Upon getting into a sort of doze, it was no wonder this uneasy posture gave me the nightmare. Under the delusion that I was about some gymnastics or other, I gave my unfortunate member such a twitch, that I started up with the idea that some one was dragging the stocks away.”

Or, in White-Jacket, the amputation performed by Dr. Cuticle:

“…and then the top-man seemed parted in twain at the hip, as the leg slowly slid into the arms of the pale, gaunt man in the shroud, who at once made away with it, and tucked it out of sight under one of the guns.”

(Note: how Melville hated doctors!

And in Moby-Dick, there is Captain Peleg (Pegleg) addressing young Ishmael:

“‘Dost see that leg?–I’ll take that leg away from thy stern…’”

And Ahab:

“So powerfully did the whole grim aspect of Ahab affect me, and the livid brand which streaked it, that for the first few moments I hardly noted that not a little of this overbearing grimness was owing to the barbaric white leg upon which he partly stood. It had preciously come to me that this ivory leg had at sea been fashioned from the polished bone of the sperm whale’s jaw. ‘Aye, he was dismasted off Japan,’ said the old Gay-Head Indian once; ‘but like his dismasted craft, he shipped another mast without coming home for it. He has a quiver of ’em.’”

and

“His three boats stove around him, and oars and men both whirling in the eddies; one captain, seizing the lineknife from his broken prow, had dashed at the whale, as an Arkansas duellist at his foe, blindly seeking with a six-inch blade to reach the fathom-deep life of the whale. That captain was Ahab. And then it was, that suddenly sweeping his sickle-shaped lower jaw beneath him, Moby-Dick had reaped away Ahab’s leg, as a mower a blade of grass in the field.”

August 1, 1819, New York City, a hot, dark night: Maria Melville, Herman’s mother, has, for the third time, gone down into the valley, and Herman, still unborn, struggling in the Dardanelles, the Narrows of a white woman, and perhaps, like the baby whales, “still spiritually feasting upon some unearthly reminiscence”–Herman dies, to the extent that all life, all vitality retreats trunkward from one leg:–and then the “chopping Boy” is born.

“deep memories yield no epitaphs.” And yet, somewhere lies the thought: one must die to be born.

Pierre:

“And here it may be randomly suggested…whether some things men think they do not know, are not for all that thoroughly comprehended by them; and yet, so to speak, though contained in themselves, are kept a secret from themselves? The idea of Death seems such a thing.”

Israel Potter:

“It was not the pang of hunger then, but a nightmare originating in his mysterious incarceration, which appalled him. All through the long hours of this particular night, the sense of being masoned up in the wall, grew, and grew, and grew upon him…he stretched his two arms sideways, and felt as if coffined at not being able to extend them straight out, on opposite sides, for the narrowness of the cell…He mutely raved in the darkness.”

White-Jacket:

“Just then the ship gave another sudden jerk, and, head foremost, I pitched from the yard. I knew where I was, from the rush of the air by my ears, but all else was a nightmare…

“As I gushed into the sea, a thunder-boom sounded in my ear; my soul seemed flying from my mouth. The feeling of death flooded over me with the billows…”

“For one instant an agonizing revulsion came over me as I found myself utterly sinking. Next moment the force of my fall was expended; and there I hung, vibrating in the mid-deep. What wild sounds then rang in my ear! One was a soft moaning, as of low waves on the beach; the other wild and heartlessly jubilant, as of the sea in the height of a tempest…The life-and-death poise soon passed; and then I found myself slowly ascending, and caught a dim glimmering of light.”

Perhaps on that hot night in August, 1819, the unborn Herman lingered like Queequeg in his coffin,

(a rehearsal of death that was all the cure the savage needed…

(the same coffin, the death-box–unhinged from the sunken whaler–on which Ishmael ultimately survived…

And we have this: the great, white, humped monster, that dismasted Ahab:

“Judge, then, to what pitches of inflamed, distracted fury the minds of his more desperate hunters were impelled, when amid the chips of chewed boats, and the sinking limbs of torn comrades, they swam out of the white curds of the whale’s direful wrath into the serene, exasperating sunlight, that smiled on, as if at a birth…”

There is again a split, a division of awareness, as earlier, at the dinner table, and for some time I am still, aware of my stillness, aware of my surroundings, of the Nineteenth-century attic whose dark, sloping lines seem an extension of frontal and parietal bones of the skull itself–aware that my attention is wandering, or perhaps fixed but inaccessible, and aware that this condition must be allowed to play itself out…

There being division, I am able to observe myself, to be at once within and without, and an exploration occurs, inwardly derived, over the surfaces, the topography of face and head, and downward over my body; I gain the sense of being different, of causing this difference in myself, of altering the outwardness of myself. I discover that flesh and muscle, perhaps even bone, and certainly cartilage, are potentially alterable, according as the plan is laid down. And the plan itself may shift and change: I may be this Michael or that, Stonecipher or Mills–Western Man or Indian, sea-dog or lubber, large-headed or small, living then or now; and even such outrageous fables as that of converting Ulysses’ men into swine become not unreasonable, when we understand that the men must have experienced some swinish designs within themselves, to which Circe had access…

Certainly, the study of Man : Literature is the study of Man : Anatomy…when it ceases to be, books become merely literary.

(Melville: “I rejoice in my spine.”

Leaning back in the chair, my body straight out, I let the awareness sweep, as a tide, through my trunk, down my legs and into my feet.

Ahab: “…I’ll order a complete man after a desirable pattern. Imprimus, fifty feet high in his socks; then, chest modelled after the Thames Tunnel; then, legs with roots to ’em, to stay in one place…”

and, with the carpenter,

“Look ye, carpenter, I dare say thou callest thyself a right good workmanlike workman, eh? Well, then, will it speak thoroughly well for thy work, if, when I come to mount this leg thou makest, I shall nevertheless feel another leg in the same identical place with it; that is, carpenter, my old lost leg; the flesh and blood one, I mean. Canst thou not drive that old Adam away?

“Truly, sir, I begin to understand somewhat now. Yes, I have heard something curious, on that score, sir; how that a dismasted man never entirely loses the feeling of his old spar, but it will be still pricking him at times. May I humbly ask if it be really so,
sir?

“It is, man. Look, put thy live leg here in the place where mine was; so, now, here is only one distinct leg to the eye, yet two to the soul. Where thou feelest tingling life; there, exactly there, to a hair, do I. Is’t a riddle?

“I should humbly call it a poser, sir.

“Hist, then. How dost thou know that some entire, living, thinking thing may not be invisibly and uninterpenetratingly standing precisely where thou now standest; aye, and standing there in thy spite? In thy most solitary hours, then, dost thou not fear eavesdroppers?”

A sudden fury lashes me, a desire to mutilate myself, to amputate the great, round, ugly globe of a clubfoot–to make it not me. As in Mardi, in the chapter Dedicated To The College Of Physicians And Surgeons,

“In Polynesia, every man is his own barber and surgeon, cutting off his beard or arm, as occasion demands. No unusual thing, for the warriors…to saw off their own limbs, desperately wounded in battle…”

and

“The wound was then scorched, and held over the smoke of the fire, till all signs of blood vanished. From that day forward it healed, and troubled Samoa but little.

“But shall the sequel be told? How that, superstitiously averse to burying in the sea the dead limb of a body yet living; since in that case Samoa held, that he must very soon drown and follow it; and how, that equally dreading to keep the thing near him, he at last hung it aloft from the topmast-stay; where yet it was suspended, bandaged over and over in cerements…

Now, which was Samoa? The dead arm swinging high as Haman? Or the living trunk below? Was the arm severed from the body, or the body from the arm? The residual part of Samoa was alive, and therefore we say it was he. But which of the writhing sections of a ten times severed worm, is the worm proper?”

The fury lingers, contorting, aggravating…

“Small reason was there to doubt, then, that ever since that almost fatal encounter, Ahab had cherished a wild vindictiveness against the whale, all the more fell for that in his frantic morbidness he at last came to identify with him, not only all his bodily woes, but all his intellectual and spiritual exasperations. The White Whale swam before him as the monomaniac incarnation of all those malicious agencies which some deep men feel eating in them, till they are left living on with half a heart and half a lung.”

and there was the woman in the mental hospital, brought onto the platform in the lecture hall to demonstrate for the medical students, of which I was one:–she suffered with a compulsion to strip her ragged clothes, and over and over to lash herself…

The anger quiets a little, becoming sardonic, and then wrying into a smile. Again, there is Ahab:

“…for this hunt, my malady becomes my most desired health.”

And Melville himself, reading of a writer whose work was presumed to be influenced by his illness, makes a marginal comment:

“So is every one influenced–the robust, the weak, all constitutions–by the very fibre of the flesh, & chalk of the bone. We are what we were made.”